/mlp/ Fanfic Reviews


FimFiction Link - Short ID: 26192/mendacity

Published: May '12Jul '13

Review in No. 38743719
Let's cut right to the chase - if you enjoy fics expanding on the show's lore, you'll probably like it. Mendacity's standout feature is the excellent Celtic-inspired lore. If exploring the place of the Fae in Equestria sounds even remotely interesting to you, go and read it. That part of the story is done really well. Other than that, however, the fic is solid but nothing extraordinary.

The main character - a changeling who's lived the last couple decades as Lyra's marefriend, the pony named Bon Bon - is alright however the story suffers from not developing Lyra enough. Bon Bon goes on a grand mission to ensure Lyra's safety but I found it a bit hard to care about the main plot because the initial LyraBon setup was extremely sparse. Thankfully the kelpie that accompanies Bon for most of her journey is more interesting.
The writing does its job fine, nothing more and nothing less. It's not bad in any way (in fact it's even somewhat good) but it also doesn't have any remarkable qualities; it's neither snappy nor evocative, it doesn't flow astonishingly well either. Mind you, that still puts it above 90%+ of the fics on the site but I wouldn't advertize "readable prose" as a major selling point. Oh and the ending was not-shit, too. I can't believe I have to mention it but with how regularly fics screw it up, it is somewhat relevant.
The pacing is probably the weakest part of the story. In some parts, major events happen one after another as the story sprints at a breakneck pace. In other chapters, the story slows down drastically and while I wouldn't call those chapters filler (they flesh out the characters, establish themes and provide more of the excellent worldbuilding), the sudden shifts in pacing felt weird. Especially since one of these excursions ends with a pretty blatant Deus Ex Machina moment that the story lampshades later on.

In the end, it's the definition of a 8/10 story. A solid 7/10 base elevated to 8/10 grade by the outstanding - by FiMfic standards - use of elements from the a rarely mentioned mythology.