/mlp/ Fanfic Reviews

You Make My Whole Life Worthwhile

FimFiction Link - Short ID: 143177/you-make-my-whole-life-worthwhile

Published: Jan '14Jul '16

Review in No. 39142284
The sequel to ‘Smile’ came six months after the original and wrecked all that was good about it.
Through ILtSYS, Rarity confided in Fluttershy about all of what was happening with Pinkie, first how insecure she felt about wanting to give a relationship a try, and then just how much she loved Pinkie, how amazing she was, and how much they enjoyed sex. What Rarity didn’t notice was how this was affecting Fluttershy. And the pony for whom Fluttershy falls is… Pinkie Pie. You know, the pony who spent the last story developing a deep emotional connection with Rarity and vice versa.
Storywise, it feels odd to have this conflict introduced just to kick off the plot. After all, nothing in ‘Smile’ hinted that Fluttershy was developing feelings for Pinkie Pie. Sure, she felt lonely, and Rarity’s constant talks of how great a relationship—and Pinkie herself—was did little to help.
While it was somewhat expected that the sequel would deal with Fluttershy, nothing suggested that she would fall for Pinkie Pie. I just imagined Rarity would help her meet new people, gain confidence, maybe talk things out with Dash so she can solve any remaining issues she has, all while the RariPie plot continues to develop in the background.
You know, the relationship we spent an entire story witnessing bloom into love.
But hey, emotional investment is for schmucks, let’s go for some more drama!
To make an extensive rant short, I’ll admit that given the circumstances, it makes sense for the Fluttershy that was shown in the first story to fall in love with Pinkie. Or, rather, the idea of Pinkie Pie Rarity projected through her constant swooning.
And that’s the crux of the issue. Nothing in either the first story or the first third of the sequel shows that Fluttershy is truly in love with Pinkie Pie to the degree Pinkie or Rarity love each other.
You know what’s the worst part? The story acts like these developments are totally natural and earned when they’re not. In the first story, the narrative, characters, and interactions convinced you Rarity and Pinkie were compatible and had strong feelings for each other that ran beyond the physical. The second story has characters say they’re in love. That’s it.
Also, may I add: Fuck Fluttershy.
After a series of misunderstandings and some well-intentioned meddling from Pinkie’s part regarding her recent attitude, Fluttershy kisses her and confesses her love. By this point Pinkie Pie and Rarity are engaged, they announced their plans for marriage in front of all of their friends and have gone on record saying how much they mean to each other.
How will Pinkie Pie and Rarity react to this enormous betrayal of their trust? They’l have a crisis for half a chapter and then immediately decide to court Fluttershy for a poly-amorous relationship, of course!
Review in No. 39142305
Chapter three of “You Make My Whole Life Worthwhile” has Rarity confront Fluttershy after she confessed and kissed Pinkie Pie. To be entirely fair, I can’t in good conscience blame Flutters for her feelings. She was lonely, and Rarity’s constant gushing only made things worse.
However, that’s the extent of it.
It’s true that Rarity and Pinkie Pie’s relationship started from a sexual encounter, but it was founded on the existing infatuation between them that didn’t stem from mere physical attraction but an admiration and respect that ran deep and had been forged through years of knowing each other.
Meanwhile, the entire basis for Fluttershy’s feelings is that she felt lonely and was constantly aroused by Rarity’s tirades of how great Pinkie was in bed.
All Rarity told Fluttershy was how aspects of Pinkie personality complemented hers, not once throughout ‘Smile’ or the first chapters of the sequel are we shown if Fluttershy feels attracted to Pinkie’s personality.
To add insult to injury, the way the narrative of chapter three is constructed, it almost seems as though the story is trying to make Rarity the antagonist. Because apparently not wanting to share your significant other is a bad thing. She raises all these valid objections as to why she doesn’t want to share Pinkie Pie with anyone else, and how what Fluttershy did is a betrayal of their trust and feels so hurt because of it. Then, everything is ignored so they can court Fluttershy one chapter later.
This leads to what I deem the second worst aspect of “You Make My Whole Life Worthwhile”. The complete assassination of Pinkie’s character.
The Pinkie Pie from the first story had depth, an arc, compelling motivations, and relatable issues that made her a full fledged character who didn’t stray far away from her core personality from the show. The sequel, however, decided to hit the reset button on her for the sake of getting the plot moving. Gone is the deep and well-rounded Pinkie, and in comes Standard-Fanfiction-Characterization-Pinkie to take her place.
“Fluttershy feels sad because she has a crush on me? Can’t have a pony being sad, let’s include her in our relationship even though that shows a complete disregard of Rarity’s feelings from my part!”
"I Love To See You Smile" showed us the depth a romantic relationship could have. “You Make My Whole Life Worthwhile”—as far as I can tell—wanted to showcase a functional polyamorous relationship, but in trying to mix those two approaches to love, it undermines both ideas.
As it stands right now, I can’t say “You Make My Whole Life Worthwhile” is one of the worst stories I’ve ever read, far from the truth, but it is probably the most ungrateful sequel I’ve ever had the disappointment of reading. It completely ignores and overrides all the positive aspects of its predecessor just to push a rushed, under-developed polyamorous relationship.
Don’t read it.