/mlp/ Fanfic Reviews

The Pact

FimFiction Link - Short ID: 538261/the-pact

Published: Jun '23

Review in No. 40077248
The pact is a 1k word cautionary tale about the importance of spell-checking.
It being so short, nearly anything I say would be considered a spoiler. It's an interesting tale, and I'd like to see more of its world.
Spoilery summary: A filly messes up and trades an evil for a bigger one.
Even more spoilery review: In her desire to rid her village of the evils of Grogar, a filly ends up summoning something much worse.
I have to say that while I did like the story, and feel it was good, I wonder if the limited word count wouldn't have been better distributed by shortening the intro and dwelling deeper on the conversation between the filly and Discord. The two biggest paragraphs are the ones at the beginning, and they serve mostly to set the scene. However, the scene hardly plays a part into the development of the plot. It's good for mood setting but--once more--considering the word count, I would've rather that mood be set around the reveal of this creature and the filly's plead for help.
Overall, it's alright, but I can see it becoming greater with just a bit of polish.