FimFiction Link - Short ID: 502182/supersedure
Published: Sep '21
Unlike the other two fics, I've enjoyed this one considerably more. My only issue was using Ocellus as the main character. I feel like this is one of the rare cases where an OC would have worked much better as the way she acts in this fic is extremely different to the way she acts in the show. (Though funnily enough I greatly prefer the fic's portrayal to the show's.) I like the idea that the hive is a very "competitive" place where not only brute force, but smarts can get you far too. The writing is fairly competent too, the gag about AJ was admittedly amusing, though I didn't see much point in so many scene switches, the story didn't really require it. Ultimately, while the plot isn't too groundbreaking, I really enjoyed the character progression of Ocellus and I feel like this aspect carried the story.
6/10 - If you only want to read a single story out of these three, it should probably be this.