/mlp/ Fanfic Reviews

Moon and Stars

FimFiction Link - Short ID: 496343/moon-and-stars

Published: Aug '21Oct '21

Review in No. 40929441
This fic immediately reminded me of TwiGuard, especially in its structure. In general, each chapter break is a time skip in Equestria under Luna with Daybreaker banished. Easily one of the most fun things about reading this was seeing how the various scenarios play out differently from canon. In many ways, this fic is a showcase for the author's headcanons about how the show's setting could be improved, and they're almost all great. Sunset Shimmer is, of course, unwelcome, but this fic probably? made pretty good use of her. I dunno, I didn't watch her stuff. More importantly, if you have any concern about this story being a rehash of the show's events or a fixfic, no: it's a totally different story and sometimes the show happens and you get to ride along.

About the [Adventure] [Slice of Life], this story leans much more heavily towards SoL, and it's usually not [Sad]. This story has an unusual interpretation on Luna, who is the main character, and I LOVE her in this fic. She is so chilled out and has a heart of absolutely solid gold. (The setting is very chilled out as well.) In retrospect, I can see some sense in blending Celestia's characterization with Luna's in this way, but it was certainly unexpected to start with. In addition to the setting being chilled out, the story also spends a lot of time with the characters in a relaxed setting. Somehow, the author just seems to have a talent for this kind of thing, and it just stood out to me.

The other main character is Twilight, as you'd expect from the description, although the story still spends most of its time with Luna. I enjoyed seeing young Twilight's adventures in Canterlot and with Luna before she's sent to Ponyville, the author was very creative in filling in these parts with some good worldbuilding and a pseudo-Celestia perspective. As for the rest of the tags, [Spike], bless the author, doesn't matter to the plot, and his character slot would be better spent on [OC]. The other two are for the end of the story.

If there is something to complain about, it's mostly that the characters are not very deep. Luna is just good and Daybreaker is just a cartoon tyrant. Even so, it is a simplicity from the show that is well captured, and consistently charming.

And now, I will do my thing: none of what I said applies to the prologue chapter, so don't read it. Just skip right on by and get to the good stuff. It is only a popcorn scene in which Celestia turns evil and is defeated. It is an outright nonsensical premise, which is strongly reflected in the chapter itself, which is rather poorly written and full of idiosyncrasies. There is a second, far better written version of the idea in the prologues of each chapter, so you're not missing anything.